Tuesday, February 3, 2009
I might be tooling down the road kinda sorta driving over the speed limit. So I watch carefully and in my mind I am trying on excuses in case I get pulled over. I come up with some really good ones but I know that once the lights flash and I pull over I will be stammering out my yes ma'ams or yessirs. But it is a game a play that allows me to laugh at who I really am.
The best excuse is to overeat and promise to make it up the next day. I did that for quite a few lifetimes.
Awhile ago I thought to enhance my attention at mass I would study the readings the week b4 mass. I was pretty faithful to it and have benefited greatly - how can I not? But as time went by I didn't do it first thing. I had plenty of time during the day. Not! So at mass I was asking the Lord what He would have me do and I felt that he grinned a little bit and said, "See if you can read the readings everyday first thing." That is the starting point. Easy! Easy?
You have no idea how many distractions there are at 5:30 am, even with no radio or television. I brew my coffee (yes an article on addictions is forthcoming) and pull out the Bible. Oh - I need to listen to the weather on my walkie-talkie - very important for the livestock! Oh - I need to write that note to remind myself to call so and so. Oh - I need to sweep up that grass that came in with my boots last night. Oh - I need to wipe the counter......!!! You get the idea. And ALL He asked me was to read the three readings first thing. He didn't even ask me to do a Bible study! I am glad that God has a sense of humor.
So I have been doing that. When things try to pull me away I have been disciplining myself to such an absurdly small thing - so that I may earn the right to do greater things for Him.
As I foster two goat babiesrealize that there are no excuses. They need fed, comfort safety and to learn to grow up. They demand it believe me! And if I am responsible I meet those demands without excuses. God doesn't not demand! He asks! So if I am to mature I must respond to the asking and not the demand. Please God help me to grow up.
Posted, picture of goat baby with one of my babies - Bernard all grown up! He is back from Afghanistan and I couldn't be prouder of him! He is such a wonderful man and such a great companion. He inspires me greatly and I am so grateful that he is my son.